London · two crew · one van
On a van job the amount of stuff is almost never the problem. One thing about it is difficult — no lift, nowhere to stop, a window somebody else set, an item that will not go through whole — and that one thing decides the crew, the kit and the day.
And if a van is the wrong answer — a whole house, a piano, a safe, two boxes and a lamp — we will say so rather than take the booking.
Six awkward bits
Not the number of boxes. Almost every van job in London has exactly one thing about it that is genuinely hard, and naming it is how we bring the right crew and the right kit rather than finding out on a landing.
One object, and the awkwardness is in the object.
Sofas, appliances, beds, wardrobes
A single object that two people can move and one person absolutely cannot. The whole job is ten minutes of lifting and an hour of thinking about how — which is why it goes wrong when nobody thought about it.
What it involves → APARTDismantling, and putting it back
A bed frame, a wardrobe, a corner sofa or a desk that went in before a wall did. Taking it apart is straightforward; getting it back together at the far end is where the skill and the missing bolt live.
What it involves →The object is fine. Getting it in or out of the building is not.
Walk-ups, turns and tight landings
A fourth-floor walk-up and a fourth floor with a lift are different jobs, and the number that decides them is not the stair width. It is the clear diagonal at the turn, and almost nobody has measured it.
What it involves → KERBRed routes, permits and the carry
The London problem. A van cannot simply stand on a red route, a bus lane, a suspended-less residents' bay or a pavement, and in a great deal of the city there is no obvious legal place to put one.
What it involves →Everything is easy except when it has to happen, or where it goes.
Collections with a fixed window
A seller who is only in until four, a shop with a goods-out window, a storage facility with gate hours, a building that permits moves on certain days only. The job is easy; the window is not negotiable.
What it involves → HOLDCollected, listed and held
Bought something before you have anywhere to put it, or out of one place before the next one exists. Collected, listed properly and held rather than left in a hallway annoying everybody.
What it involves →What two people can actually lift
"Man and van" gets sold as though two people and a Luton can do anything. They cannot, and the useful thing a firm can tell you is exactly where the line is. Two of these six are jobs we turn down.
Two people, comfortably — until the turn
Weight is rarely the issue with a sofa. Shape is. A fixed-back three-seater that went into a flat before a stud wall went up sometimes cannot come out at all, and that is established with a tape rather than discovered with four people sweating on a landing.
Two people and a sack truck. Do not do it yourself
Awkward, top-heavy and with nothing good to hold. A tall American-style one is genuinely at the limit of two people on stairs and needs straps rather than optimism. It also needs standing upright and left to settle before being switched on.
Two people, with the drum secured
Heavy, dense and fine to carry — but the drum swings unless the transit bolts go back in, and a swinging drum damages the machine and the people carrying it. If you have lost the bolts, say so and we will strap it.
Not us. A piano specialist
It is not a weight question, it is a technique-and-insurance question. Two people and a van moving an upright down a flight is how pianos and backs get broken, and we will tell you that rather than take the booking.
Depends entirely — ask first
Some are two-person items and some need equipment and a structural opinion about the floor. Send a photograph and the make or the dimensions before booking anything, and we will be straight about which.
Two people and a van, easily
The classic van job and the one that goes best. Everything is liftable by one person, the volume fits, and the only real variable is how many trips up the stairs — which is what the crew size is for.
Unsure about yours? Send a photograph with the make or the rough dimensions before booking anything. It takes a minute and it is the difference between a crew that arrives ready and a crew that arrives short.
When a van is the wrong answer
Taking work we should not is how a cheap-looking job becomes an expensive afternoon, and it is the commonest complaint about this end of the trade. Here is where the line is, in public, before you ring anybody.
A removals lorry and a proper crew. A van doing three trips costs more than the right vehicle doing one and takes most of a day longer, and we will quote it that way rather than sell you the cheap-looking option.
A piano specialist, every time. It is a technique and insurance question rather than a weight one, and a general crew attempting it is how instruments and people get hurt.
Somebody with the equipment and, where the floor is in question, somebody qualified to have an opinion about it. Send a photograph and we will tell you which specialist rather than guess.
A specialist carrier with the right packing and the right cover. Our cover is ordinary goods-in-transit cover and it is not the right instrument for something irreplaceable.
A courier, or your own car and a friend. It is a genuine answer and it is cheaper than we are. We would rather say it than take an hour of your money for something that did not need a van.
Frequently you and one other person plus a booked lift slot. Ask the concierge before you ask us — it may cost you an afternoon and nothing else.
A van to Europe
A few items of furniture and some cartons to Brussels, Dublin, Warsaw or Prague. It is a real service rather than a stretch, and one the big firms quote badly because their unit is a lorry and yours is half a room.
Brussels, Antwerp, Ghent, Bruges and the coast.
What a van can do here →Dublin, Cork, Galway and the west, by road and ferry.
What a van can do here →Warsaw, Kraków, Wrocław, Poznań and the Tri-City.
What a van can do here →Prague, Brno, Ostrava and the Bohemian towns.
What a van can do here →And on the longer corridors we will tell you when a shared lorry load is cheaper than a van of your own — which on the Polish route it usually is. How a van to Europe actually works.
Asked most often
More on the questions page — single heavy items, stairs and buildings, parking and the street, collections and timing, and the things we will not do.
Both addresses, what the item is, and the one thing about the job that is difficult. A photograph beats any description.